Which came first?

F good, What's greater my readers? As one or two of ya'll know, I'm sitting here waiting on this egg to crack so to speak. I'm a pessimist by nature. I never put all of my eggs in one basket because I've never seen a basket made out of Charmin and marshmallows. They all seem to be made out of cast iron, which ain't that good for egg shells.

Enough symbolism.

I have a major distribution deal on the table for my record label. It could be a big break. It could be a set-up for disappointment. With that said, It's time for a REALITY CHECK.

So what's worse, a hater or a groupie? I really don't know anymore. I decided to tell my internet family about my recent development. I wasn't thrown off by the rapid influx of congrats and support, or the abundance of
,NT's always shown love to me anyway; ever since I was 16 rapping "keystyles" with Kneesh from Chicago. But I was rather shocked to see how many people had only saltine things to say. I don't know why it surprised me, after all, I am a pessimist as I said. What I want to ask my readers is this: Given the opportunity, is it more natural to support a complete stranger out of the "goodness of man", or is it more natural to be in competition with a complete stranger seeing as we're all under the same sun, sharing the same limited resources?

What wins out, natural or civilized behavior? We gotta get better as a people, people.

I'm not mad at my haters. Somebody has to hate and it's not gonna be me. It might as well be you. I'd rather be the somebody winning the lotto. But that very basic instinct, that jealousy, is archaic and unnecessary. Whereas it might have given you the edge in surviving 1500 year ago, in this day and age it's not like we're competing to survive. Well, not in the sense that you would be affected by another man's success in music. If I'm eating off rap, there's more than enough food for you to fix a plate from whatever you're good at. I'm not stepping on anybody's opportunities, that ain't real. That ain't Rilla. I'm just embracing my own. It's far too many crabs in this barrel today. Once you start climbing out of it, you'll see for yourself

Live from LHNS, by way of Gangster Island,
Young Rilla

Mr. Governor, I swear there's a cover up....

I was just driving through my city last night.... smoking on a white grape White Owl.... so maybe it was the munchies that put me on game... but I noticed there are actually more liquor stores in Gary, IN than food joints. Ain't that a bitch? There isn't 3 sit-down restaurants worth a damn inside of my 53 square blocks. There used to be a jiggy little mom-and-pop Black owned Italian joint in Miller. It was called La Dolce Vida and there used to be little slam sessions and open mic nights up there every Tuesday. Now it's closed and the building is up for sale. That spot lasted all of a year and a half... maybe. I know rii?

My question is this: What does it say about a community where the only thriving businesses either sale Hennessey or narcotics? To me it says that when people don't have shit else, they lose site of their priorities. I can't even lie, I do it to. Hell, I bought that blunt with the same money that probably should have gone into my gas tank with my taking-late-night-strolls-like- gas- is-free ass. It's almost as if you get this mentality like, "Well fuck it, if ain't nothing else gonna go right today, I bet you I catch my buzz. Fuck it!". Well to be honest, I'm tired of living that way. I'm tired of watching people live, and die, that way.

You don't change your world with one HUGE action... most of the time. It's usually done with the gradual accumulation of small baby steps, but once you look back on it...whoa.

My nigga Nas said it best:

"I switched my motto, instead of saying fuck tomorrow, that buck that bought a bottle could have struck the lotto"

It's amazing what a little change can do. You can fill the gas tank of my car for the same cost as a 5th of Crown Royal just to put it in perspective. How many Saturday night 5ths have you killed in your life? Could you see yourself driving up a whole tank of gas in one Saturday though? How many opportunities to better yourself have you passed up because you didn't think about the following Sunday?

Do the math. there's 52 2-day weekends a year. Let's say you party (drink, smoke, or whatever) on most of those days (3/4s or so). That's 78 days out of the year, right? That's not that much right? Remember that.

Now you're already asleep 8 hours a day (or more if you're lazy like me) so that's 33% of your life being lived in a dream. Now that 78 days a year adds up to 21% of your time. BUT... remember, you can only party IF you're awake, so really it's taking 21% of the 66% of your total lifespan (because 33% of that time you are sleep so you're not partying during those hours). Now I'm not a math wiz at all, but I believe that leaves you with about 52% of live left after "taxes". That's crazy. 48% of your life is a joke. But the shit ain't even funny... it's sad.

I can only lead the horse to water. I can't make it drink think....

It's been real,
Young Rilla live from LHNS by way of Gangster Island

On the Real...

Aye fam, everyday I wake up and wonder why some rappers never seem to keep it authentic, ya know? How many bum ass dudes are gonna waste their advance check on a chain this summer (only to have it stolen anyway...)? That's why I'm me, Young Rilla-than-these-fuck-boys.... or just Rilla for short. I ain't saying I'm the best rapper in the midwest. I'll let Jewels take that claim...ha.. But what I can guarantee is that I'll be giving you readers (and listeners) the REAL with every post from a perspective you can only gain from living 20 years in the belly of the beast. Somebody's got to do it. I just so happen to be that somebody. Just a few random REALITY CHECKS I wanna throw out there: Serena Williams can get it. Jasmine Sullivan is retarded. But talented. But still retarded.. Kobe > Lebron Jesus was middle eastern. And with that, I'm gonna fall back and chill for a sec... Live from L.H.N.S. by way of Gangster Island -Young Rilla